Why the time to act is NOW

Why the time to act is NOW

I don’t know about you but I’ve been on the receiving end of some pretty fierce sales calls in the past. I make an enquiry and before I know what has happened my credit card is melting and they won’t let me off the phone until I have made a purchase. It feels pretty horrible and I always tell myself I’m never going to do that to anyone else.  So I don’t.

There is psychology behind the pressure that is applied to us by salespeople, but I think it is misunderstood. If you understand this psychology, you can have sales discussions in a more authentic way, which is what we want to do as coaches or service providers.

I had a mentor that I respected and continue to respect. I mentioned I had a sales conversation with a prospective client but they were not ready so I let them go. She said,

“No no no, you can’t let the bodies go cold!”

I was horrified. That’s everything I don’t want to stand for and I would never put people in that position. And the truth is, you don’t have to, but there is a fine line…


“Weebles wobble but they don’t fall down”

What it comes back to is our psychology.

We are hard-wired to belong and to fit in. Whenever we do something that takes us outside of that, we look to find the balance again.

Do you remember Weebles? “Weebles wobble but they don’t fall down”

We are all like Weebles, if we try to make a change in any direction, we are hard-wired to come back to centre.


We are also hard-wired to belong.

Why is this? Going back 100,000 years we all lived in tribes and if you stood up to the leader or were different, there was a very real risk you could be outcast. That was a threat to your survival because if you met the sabre tooth tiger you were on your own, or if you ran out of food that was it.

We’re still working with 100,000 year old brains, so modern day situations can have the same effect. Anytime we want to make a big change, for example, lose weight, get a promotion, change jobs, move away or start a family, anything that is a change, means we are going to stand out.

People are going to notice us do something differently and that has the same impact as standing up to the leader of the tribe. So when you become more visible it triggers that same fear mechanism which leads to fight/ flight/ freeze.


This makes us do things that don’t make sense.

We don’t have a real threat to fight so it shows up as procrastination, picking fights with family, ambivalence. This is the fight/ flight/ freeze mechanism in action.

We sabotage the change we want to make, to keep us in homeostasis, like the Weebles.


What can we do?

It is important to know that people are hard-wired to return to the safe option. When you are looking to get an agreement with your prospective client on your connection call you can be aware of the feelings they may have.  

I tell my prospective clients when I’m speaking to them that this is going to happen. I say to them,

“You’re going to get off this call and talk yourself out of working with me. It’s natural, when that happens just notice it and say that’s what Lorraine said would happen.”


Sometimes this will also happen with retained clients. When your client is nearing the end of their current package they may tell you they can’t afford to continue working with you. There is a whole spectrum of arguments about whether money is a real objection or not, however most of us, if we truly want something, will find the money to do it.

It’s more a lack of belief in self that stops us from stepping up and investing in ourselves. It’s more a conversation that we’re having with our self saying

“I’m not worth it. I can’t do it. I’m going to be the one it doesn’t work for.”


There are three things I want to share with you in that situation:-


1. Start finding your 90% clients.

It happens a whole lot less with them.  (If you don’t know who your 90% client is, read this blog post…)


2. Reconnect people with their truth.

  • Why did they start working with you in the first place?
  • What was it they wanted to achieve?
  • How were they not doing that before they had your help?

Remind them that it’s in their DNA to revert backwards to where they were before.

Always do this with integrity. It’s not about manipulation or coercion, it’s not about pressure.

It’s about telling the truth.


3. Follow up with clients you have let go in the past.

If they said they needed a bit of a break then you can check in with them. Some of them might be ready to come back, however some may have gone back into their safe space.


I hope this inspires you to change the way you have conversations and to understand the reasons behind those high pressure sales conversations that appear to be missing the heart part of making a decision in the moment.

Remember it is the same for us, so when we are faced with the opportunity of stepping up and doing something different we are going to feel fear and experience the fight/ flight/ fear mechanism.

Bear that in mind when you’re ready to look for your next up level with your next coach, recognise the feelings and act NOW.


Mindset & Message Mastery will provide you with the tools to understand what is getting in your way, on your way to success. It will help you connect the dots to Confidence, Clarity and, most importantly, Clients.


Why the client you can help the most is not your ideal client

Why the client you can help the most is not your ideal client

Do you find yourself spending all your time on building mailing lists, working on your sales funnel, learning new software, posting on social media and designing the best website?

And then wonder where are my clients? What am I actually in business to do?

I know I did, until I took the time to revisit what was important to me in my business and I realised that it was working at the highest level to connect with and help my clients, especially my ideal clients.

“But who are my ideal clients?”

One of the most important things that I have learned since I turned my business on its head is that working at your highest level does not always mean helping those who need your help the most.

“Not helping those who need you most?”

Some of my best clients are those who I have done little actively for, because they are already 90% towards their transformation.

  • They are highly motivated
  • They are investing in themselves
  • They are incredibly connected to their vision

So I don’t need to do very much for them. The value of holding space for them is immense though.

Yet we have this conditioning that says for work to be valuable, it has to be hard – not true. I am there to guide these ‘90% clients’ and support them to complete their transformations. Many of them will come to me because I am known for turning everything on its head. Just like the way I transformed my own business.  They have gotten so far, but need my help with the vital 10%.

Be specific about the right clients for you

You can use all the right tools to build your online business, have the best mentors and follow the correct steps to grow your business but unless you are really living and investing in what you want to teach and share with others, there will be a disconnect. It is that disconnect which makes it harder for you to understand the specifics of who you need to work with to get that true transformation for them.

Once you realise this and you are able to truly live the way you want and have clarity in what is important for you in your business, then you will be able to work at your highest level. This will let you discover who your ideal clients are and how you can work with them to maximise their growth. Whilst this may be a mix of different clients, with different needs, your 90% clients can help support and build your business.

90% clients can help build your business

Not only are 90% clients easier for you to work with, they are more likely to be the clients you get the best results from and they will be the clients who will tell their friends and colleagues about you and the great work you are doing together.

Your 90% clients can really help with building a referral rich reputation as they will refer other great clients to you.


Performing at your highest level

So take the time to look inside yourself, realise where you are blocking yourself from performing at the highest level possible for you and make those changes – hint: you will likely find it at the edge of your resistance. Then you can be specific about who your 90% clients are and how best to find them.

Once you do that, you and your business will be transformed.


Mindset & Message Mastery will provide you with the tools to understand what is getting in your way, on your way to success. It will help you connect the dots to Confidence, Clarity and, most importantly, Clients.


4 Steps to staying on track

4 Steps to staying on track


As a coach the first thing I do with my new clients is to identify their goals.  After all, if we don’t know what we are working towards, how will we know when

a) we’ve reached it, or
b) we’re even on the right track?

Time and again I see people get sidetracked from their own goals into a world of marketing madness, which is really just the modern day equivalent of the wolf tempting Little Red Riding Hood off her path.  Ok, well maybe not, but it IS a distraction.

I’m pretty sure that most of you reading this are not passionate about working 90 hours a week to build funnels and websites, or understand the lingo of landing pages and FB pixels.  (And if you are, then I can connect you with some very clever people who can help you with that.)


It’s far more likely that you are passionate about making a living from making a difference.

So let’s get back to basics and set some goals that work for YOU, not just straying from the path to the next big thing in online marketing.

Because the truth is, that the people who are telling you about the next big thing, probably don’t have the same goals you do right now, so their drive and desire for the work involved are completely different.  

Now it’s beginning to make sense, right?

There are a few steps to setting goals that will keep you on track.


1. Values check-in.  

When did you last check in with what is most important to you?  Values are our moral compass, and exploring values is the first step to understanding the right goals for you.
Values and their priority change at different times in our life, so I encourage you to check in with them regularly.  You can use a tool like the Wheel of Life to check your values.


2. Creating the Vision. 

Now that you know what’s most important to you, you need to know what that value would look like at 100%.
This is where we can begin to see opportunities for goal setting.  For example, if Health is a priority value for you, then we can begin to set business goals that allow you to create more time and space for your health (I’ve been doing exactly that for this past year).
Similarly if wealth and security are high priority values, then there are goals we can set that satisfy those.  If contribution or impact are high priority values, then the goals might be different.

So you see why it is important to do that values work first?


3. Find the Resistance.

Now that you have your goals, let’s look at the smartest way to achieve them.  This is where it is enormously helpful to work with a coach.  At this point, we begin to get scared, and that’s no bad thing – if you know how to handle it.  When we want change, we trigger our internal and ancient safety instinct which wants to keep us safe at all costs.  And safe usually means staying where you are.  Pay attention to the resistance that you feel – this is your greatest opportunity for growth.

4. Chunk your goal into tiny tasks.  

The fastest way to trigger your fight/flight/freeze mechanism is by trying to do too much.
Chunk your goals into smaller blocks, and then chunk them into even smaller tasks until every step on the way to succeeding is small enough to not procrastinate over.
Did you know that procrastination and perfectionism are just moder
n day equivalents of fight/flight/freeze?
I start with a 5x5 plan: first I chunk my big goals into 5 smaller chunks, then I chunk those smaller goals into 5 tasks.  If the tasks are still large I will further chunk them down until they are manageable.


There you have it, 4 steps to staying on your own path.


The chances are that if you are spending all your time on social media and writing blogs, and that’s not clearly aligned with your priority values, that you need a different way to look at your business.  That’s why I created Mindset and Message Mastery.

Mindset & Message Mastery will provide you with the tools to understand what is getting in your way, on your way to success. It will help you connect the dots to Confidence, Clarity and, most importantly, Clients.



Building a Referral Rich Reputation

Building a Referral Rich Reputation

The online world is becoming saturated with people trying to emulate their role models’ launch formulas, and they are not getting the results they hope for – sometimes not even close.

The internet is full of claims of 6 and 7 figure launches, but what they are not sharing is the amount of profit from those launches, and the reach that people are utilising from affiliates with lists in the tens, sometimes hundreds of thousands.

Don’t get me wrong, there are some people who do well, but the majority are finding it harder and harder to make a profit from their traditional funnel and product hierarchy.

What worked just a few years ago is no longer working in the same way. We are becoming more savvy as consumers, and we have more choice than ever before.

I called it in 2015, but I think more people are ready to hear it…

The Information Age is dead.

The great news is though, that the Implementation Age is alive and well. And if your real desire is to help other people, and make an impact in the world by working with clients, premium clients first and foremost, then this is very good news indeed.

You do not need an opt-in, low, mid and premium offer to attract clients. You just don’t.

You see, the online world works a lot like the offline world.

Reputation and word of mouth are king.

I reverse engineered what it takes to create a reputation that results in clients who readily refer, get results and sometimes even write me songs as testimonials… (It’s true – you can see a client testimonial/song I received here)


There are three main themes to consider when you are building a reputation for getting great results with your clients.

– you need to be able to create a safe environment for your client to reach the best results they can. They need to feel confident in you, so you need to feel confident in you.

– it takes you getting exceptionally clear about who are the very BEST clients for you and your business. Who are the people who will get the best results from your work and approach, and will they refer more amazing clients to you?

– genuine connection and authenticity come from really getting to know those clients well.
Let’s look at the intersection of these themes…

Confidence + Clarity = Market Position

You know exactly who you are talking to and where in the market your offer fits.

Clarity + Empathy = Compelling Invitation

You can make a powerful invitation to work together when you can demonstrate your deep understanding of their challenges.

Confidence + Empathy = Authentic Engagement

When you claim your genuis and marry it with empathy for your client, you can confidently say, ‘I see you, I know what scares you the most, and I can help.’

When you understand how these themes and their intersections are connected, you can begin to really build a business filled with clients that you love, and who love you back.

When they love you back, and refer their friends and colleagues to you, that is when you have cultivated a Referral Rich Reputation.

And there is no funnel in sight.

Let me be clear, there is a place for automation in your business, and there is also a time where introduction of tiered offers becomes not only effective, but necessary.

I encourage you to think carefully though, about when that is for you.

If you are just starting out, and need to build your confidence and bank balance, then build your referral rich reputation first, before leveraging your delivery.

I’m thrilled to see more people questioning the upsell funnel model, especially when they are beginning.

Consider this your permission to do things differently, your way.

Mindset & Message Mastery will provide you with the tools to understand what is getting in your way, on your way to success. It will help you connect the dots to Confidence, Clarity and, most importantly, Clients.


Make Friends with your Inner Critic

Make Friends with your Inner Critic

When you first begin your entrepreneurial journey, it can feel a bit like being attached by a bungy cord.

For every bit of progress you make towards your goals, somehow you end up questioning whether you can actually pull off your audacious dream.

That little voice inside you is there telling you you’re not good enough, that you can’t do it, that you can’t be like those you admire.


But here’s what’s really going on…


What is actually happening is an interesting paradox, that is commonly seen in entrepreneurs, but actually happens whenever we set out to make any change.


You see as humans, we are hardwired to stay safe – it’s what we needed to ensure survival of the species – and that part of us still exists.

The paradox occurs because staying ‘safe’ and in comfort zone is at complete odds with being a successful entrepreneur. It’s all about stepping OUT of your comfort zone.


Historically the advice has been to ‘Push through’, ‘Take action’. Just do it!


But at some point your inner critic will throw a toddler tantrum and stop you in your tracks.


What can you do to stop it before it starts?

Quite simply, or not so simply, it is to make friends with your inner critic. That voice inside your head.


How To Make Friends With Your Inner Critic


  • Interrupt her – recognise the feelings first, then notice what your inner critic is saying. Then interrupt her!
  • Interrupt her by acknowledging that what she is saying is important to her purpose, but that you have a different purpose. Say ‘Thank you for keeping me safe, but I’ve got this.’
  • If none of that quietens her, then it might be time to look at hiring a mindset coach to help you.


Mindset & Message Mastery will provide you with the tools to understand what is getting in your way, on your way to success. It will help you connect the dots to Confidence, Clarity and, most importantly, Clients.


10 Things I Did Instead Of List building

10 Things I Did Instead Of List building

“The money is in the list”

Have you heard that? I know I have….for years. It seems that the only way to create an online business, doing what you love, is to create the biggest, baddest list in all the webdom.

And, don’t get me wrong, having an engaged list is a truly great thing, but it is not the only way to make your business successful.

And it can take a lot of work.

More and more, I am speaking to people who have been focusing on the list building model solely, to build their business, and they are burnt out, feeling undervalued and disconnected from their core work and genius.

I was there last year. I had bought into the model and was spending all of my time (it felt like) creating freebie after freebie, and still not seeing my engagement numbers increase on my list.

It was utterly soul-destroying. I was working a full-time corporate job as well as putting my focus back into my business, and I spent all my free time creating content for a vacuum.

So I stopped.

I completely stopped and took stock of what I was doing.

It’s been over a year since I did any form of active list building and it’s been my best year ever.

I thought it might be helpful to share what I’ve been doing in the interim, and also the mindset shifts I’ve had, that have helped me get to a place where it feels authentic to invite more people into my sphere and onto my list again.

1. I realized that if I was focused on the traditional funnel model, it was going to take me forever and a day to get people through to where I actually got excited about working with them. (1:1) So I put my focus on attracting 1:1 clients instead at a premium price.

2. I began to engage with people in Facebook groups and offline and talked to them about what they needed.

3. I gave a lot of value in those conversations and became known for saying something different and being helpful.

4. People began to ask to work with me! No sales pitches, just a confident response, and being prepared to walk away and not compromise on my prices (that took a bit of work!)

5. I followed up with people who had expressed an interest before, and realised that I wasn’t actually bugging them. Life is so busy that things get away from people. They were genuinely happy that I reached out, and some of them hired me.

6. I got really clear on who I wanted to work with, and who I didn’t, because it’s hard enough to build a business without having out with people who aren’t going to get the best results from working with you!

7. I stopped trying to convince people to work with me (this was a MAJOR shift) and realised it’s not my responsibility to make them want to change, I can only set out what I can do and invite them to take part. I can’t, and don’t want to make them. (Refer to point 6.)

8. I set my prices higher than ever before. That began to filter people for me so I didn’t have to, and I began working with really motivated folks who got the best results.

9. I began to get referrals from said motivated folks who got great results. Yay!

10. I asked my very small list what they wanted and created a format that works for me, and my unsubscribes stopped. Every so often I’ll get an email from one of them telling me how much they appreciate my stuff, so I know that sometimes it feels like I’m in a vacuum, but people are actually reading and watching and listening.

Here are some of my key learnings from going through this process:

      • you CAN attract clients without a list
      • people want to hear from you more than you think
      • list building is a key component of your online business, but it is not the only one. Create connections and focus on building the relationships you want with your END client in mind
      • be selective about who you want to work with, AND who you want to have on your list. There’s no point in gathering thousands of contacts if they are never going to qualify to work with you
      • list building is not BAD or WRONG, but you need to be in the headspace where it serves both you, and the person that you are inviting onto your list
      • those email addresses belong to PEOPLE, real people! Ask them what they want.
      • you do not have to be held to ransom by random strangers who have done nothing more than giving you their email address. You get to make the rules.

If you have made it this far, then I truly hope that you have found this empowering and useful. I am a real person too, so leave me a comment about which activities you can apply TODAY to YOUR business, and begin to shift your focus back to serving clients rather than solely building a list.


Mindset & Message Mastery will provide you with the tools to understand what is getting in your way, on your way to success. It will help you connect the dots to Confidence, Clarity and, most importantly, Clients.